I broke up with my ex about 4 months ago and we haven’t spoken since. Out of the blue, she sent me a scan picture yesterday, claiming I’m the father. The first thing I asked was how far along she was, considering she was sending me a scan.
She mentioned she didn’t know for a while due to irregular periods, but by the time of the scan, she was 13 weeks pregnant. I did some quick math – 13 weeks is about 3 months, but since we broke up 4 months ago, she would be closer to 17 weeks if I were the father.
I questioned why she didn’t inform me sooner and she said she was scared. When I brought up the discrepancy in dates, she defended herself by saying that a pregnancy can take a few weeks to get established and that the dating starts from the last menstrual period or something like that.
I wasn’t convinced. The last time we were intimate was the day before our breakup, which doesn’t align with her being 13 weeks pregnant unless there was another partner in the picture. She admitted to being with someone else post-breakup but claimed they used protection.
I insisted on a paternity test to clear up any confusion. Her family, including her mother and sister, have also contacted me, urging me to accept paternity without the test, accusing me of being unreasonable. I see my request as valid given the timeline issues.
She agreed to the test but was clearly upset, insisting there was no need because I’m the father and should take responsibility. I clarified that I would take responsibility if the child is mine but, until proven, I didn’t want further contact. I’ve been made to feel foolish over this, but the numbers just don’t add up for me.
Thanks for the explanations about pregnancy dating in the comments. I’m admittedly not well-versed in this area, especially with irregular periods complicating things.
And yes, I acknowledge I was foolish for not using protection.