Before I start, I want to preface by saying I have never been close with my MIL, as she and my husband have always had a very codependent relationship and she has overstepped many boundaries.
On September 1 of this year, my MIL was bringing our son home from a soccer game. As she was pulling away, she accidentally ran over and killed my beloved dog of 10 years. I, luckily, did not witness this, but my husband and our 8 year old son did. After we realized my dog could not be saved and my MIL heard this news, she left without saying anything and went radio silent for 3 days. I can easily say that this day was one of the most traumatic of my life.
After 3 days, my husband reached out to ask where they had been the last 3 days and my MIL simply stated she had “been busy.” No checking in. No apologies. Nothing. I let her know that the death of my dog was extremely devastating not only for me but for our entire family. (She is a huge dog person and understands when dogs are like members of the family). I also explained that I understood it was a freak accident, but for closure, I needed some sort of accountability and apology. She stated she wouldn’t and couldn’t apologize for something she wasn’t sure was her fault. My husband explained that he and our son witness ed the tragedy and it was in fact her that killed our dog. She sent a very half hearted text stating that she would only apologize because she was being told to.
That was it. There has been no mention of this day since. The grief of losing my dog so tragically has been enormous. I haven’t spoken to my MIL since. My husband continues to maintain a relationship with her and also hasn’t confronted her about it. Like I said, I completely understand it was a freak accident, but there was little accountability. Since then, I’ve found myself to be very angry and bitter towards not only her, but also towards my husband for allowing this to unfold as it has. I want to move forward with the grief without so much hate and anger, but I’m not sure how. Any and all advice would be helpful.
