My girlfriend (20F) and I (20M) had been dating for a while, and two days ago, she asked if her stepbrother (23M) could come over to hang out with us. I’d only met him a few times, but he seemed like a regular guy. Since my parents were away for the weekend. I thought it would be fine. He even offered to bring booze and pizza.
My 15-year-old sister was home but stayed in her room the whole time while the three of us hung out. After a while, my girlfriend’s stepbrother said he needed to use the washroom. I pointed him to the one down the hall, and we went back to chatting. However, after a bit, we heard raised voices upstairs.
When I went up to check, I found my sister crying. Here’s what I gathered from her: instead of going to the washroom, my girlfriend’s stepbrother went upstairs and into her room (her door was slightly open). She was startled but tried to remain calm, asking him to leave. Instead, he shut the door behind him and started trying to chat her up. When she tried to leave, he blocked her and even grabbed her arm, but she managed to open the door and get out, which is when I showed up.
I was livid. There was a lot of yelling, and my girlfriend’s stepbrother was stammering and making excuses. My girlfriend tried to mediate, telling me to calm down and not act based on “word of mouth.” But I saw my sister crying and panicked I knew she wasn’t lying.
What really set me off was when my girlfriend suggested that my sister might be lying “for attention,” right in front of her. I yelled at her to get out, along with her stepbrother. She later texted me saying I scared her by yelling, but she has yet to apologize to my sister or even acknowledge how inappropriate her stepbrother’s behavior was.
When I followed up, she doubled down, saying there’s “no hard proof” and nothing really happened because her stepbrother didn’t physically harm my sister. She told me to drop it and said she’d “deal with him.”
Now I’m questioning if I overreacted. Maybe I shouldn’t have yelled or lost my temper. But at the same time, I can’t ignore what happened, and I feel like my girlfriend completely disregarded my sister’s fear and safety.
Top Comments:
NTA. She said you scared her by yelling, but somehow doesn’t think your 15-year-old sister would be scared of a drunk adult man coming into her room uninvited and refusing to leave? That’s wild. There’s no excuse for what he did, and honestly, your girlfriend defending him is a massive red flag.
There’s no “discussion” to be had. She saw him in your sister’s room. There’s no innocent explanation for that, and by defending him, she’s enabling his behavior.