NTA. It’s your money, and you have every right to protect it, especially since you’ve been working hard to save for your future. While it’s admirable to help your family, giving your mother unrestricted access to your savings account is a step too far. It puts you at risk of losing the financial stability you’ve built for yourself.
If your mom truly needs money for a specific emergency, she can come to you, explain the situation, and ask for help. That way, you maintain control and can decide how best to support your family without compromising your goals.
Your sister’s argument that “what’s the point of saving if you’re not going to help your family” overlooks the fact that helping doesn’t mean giving up your financial autonomy. Boundaries are crucial, especially when it comes to money.
Stick to your decision, and if necessary, reassure your mom that you’re still willing to help—just on your terms. Also, consider moving your savings to an account your mom doesn’t know about or explore other ways to safeguard it, like a high-yield online savings account. Protecting your finances isn’t selfish; it’s responsible.
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NTA. Don’t do it, they will drain that account, it is not normal to request access to someone’s bank account.
There is no valid reason for a 24 year old to share access to a savings account with a parent.
If Mom really needs money, she can ask OP. OP can decide at that time whether she wants to help.
My parents haven’t had access to my accounts ever, as an adult. They’ve never asked to have access.
“Mom, if you need money, you can ask me. I’m not giving you or anyone else access to my account. Stop being weird and most of all, stop asking.”
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Yes. If Mom needs “quick emergency funds” she should get a credit card and keep it with her.
If she doesn’t qualify for a credit card with a spending limit as high as the balance of a 24 year old’s savings account – she definitely isn’t responsible enough to have unlimited access to their life savings.
Or she’s already got one in OP’s name & it’s already maxed out
