I’m 18 (male, im gay lol) and a high school senior, and there’s this guy in the grade below me whom I’m really close to. He’s a junior but he’s 16 since his birthday is later in the school year.
He asked me out, and I told him I’m not sure, and really I wanna date him, but the whole idea of being a legal adult and going after a minor feels wrong, because I feel this expectation that once I’m 18, I shouldn’t be dating someone who’s under 18 or it’s predatory and stuff like that.
I feel kinda bad cuz it’s logically not bad and I also really like him, so it would be great for the both of us.
AITA?
TOP COMMENT
Don’t do it. There was a case a few years ago of a couple where he was 2 years older than she was. Her family didn’t approve of the relationship. As soon as he turned 18, the girl’s family filed a criminal complaint. He got put in jail for several years for having sex with a minor and is now a registered sex offender.
Edit to add: Google the name “Genarlow Wilson” – the name of the young man who was convicted.
REPLY
I don’t think either of you are the asshole here. It’s not illegal to date someone a year younger than you. Age is a thing and if you can’t get past that I’m sure dude will get over you soon. The general public does not see a large difference between 17 and 18. My wife is 9 month older than me and I tease her for being old but we are virtually the same age.
RESPONCE
You are NOT THE ASSHOLE.
its a sad situation really, since the one who wants to love you and trust you is technically “not at age.” 2 years of difference, honestly is NOT Far-Fetched for a relationship, especially when it comes to peer group and similar demographic, but RULES are RULES… that we have to hold up to in societal law… and the best thing to tell him honestly is “I would be ready for anything in 2 years.” Say it with a smile, and make it subtle and honest enough, that way no one is hurt and there is enough to read between the lines.<3
TOP COMMENT
I’d be very careful of the relevant age of consent laws and this includes the allowable age difference in your state. If you breach these, you could be in trouble with the law. YWBTA if you breach these. Not worth the risk.
REPLY
Depends on the state, the age of consent, and if there are Romeo and Juliet laws. If the age of consent is 16 or there are Romeo and Juliet laws, go for it. You are peers and go to the same school, it’s not creepy or predatory – he’s less than 2 years younger than you.
RESPONCE
18 and 16 (especially only one grade apart) should not be a problem at all. I was in the same situation in hs, I was 16 and a junior and dated an 18 yo senior. We looked up Romeo and Juliet laws in our state and the range was 15-25 (15 yos can be with 18, and 17 can be with 25). Look up the laws in your state but with one grade apart no one would bat an eye. I think you’re good