I read this story on Reddit about a woman grappling with her stepmother-in-law’s difficult and toxic behavior. Despite trying to keep peace and maintain hope, every interaction with her leaves the woman feeling upset and drained.
During a recent holiday gathering, the stepmother-in-law made derogatory comments about the woman’s country of origin, mocked the size of her house for hosting friends, and intruded on a private conversation her husband was having about his health. These incidents are just a glimpse of the ongoing manipulation and criticism she has endured over the years.
One particularly damaging moment in the past involved the stepmother-in-law pretending to be the father-in-law and sending a “thumbs down” response to a family group text, shattering the woman’s trust. Since then, every interaction has left her feeling uneasy, culminating in physical discomfort like stomach aches when she knows she’ll have to face her. The father-in-law, seemingly under the stepmother-in-law’s manipulative control, has even been turned against one of his own sons, adding further strain to family dynamics.
While the woman’s husband doesn’t let his stepmother’s behavior bother him and wishes to avoid upsetting his father, the woman feels increasingly stuck. Avoiding her entirely is difficult because of her two young children, who love spending time with their grandfather. She’s torn between standing up to the stepmother-in-law’s disrespect, ignoring her behavior, or limiting interactions altogether.
“Start staying home when he goes over. If her crap doesn’t bother him, then it shouldn’t bother him when you decide to avoid it.”
“Spend the least amount of time in her presence.”
It’s a tough situation balancing her children’s relationship with their grandfather while protecting her own mental health.
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